First, this is something I personally don’t understand. There are some women who bring their spouse to their vaginal ultrasound exam. I often want to ask, “Does she accompany you to the urologist to watch you back that ass up —readying it for the digital exam?” Stay home or in the lobby! Unless there is a legitimate support person necessary for you to function, visitors are frowned upon. We do always offer medical chaperones for sensitive exams.
DO NOT:
As I pull the stirrups out to set up for the vaginal portion of the exam, please for the love of God DON’T say, “Honey, we need a set-up like this at home.” I do not need that visual, but it’s great blog material, thanks!
DO NOT:
When I begin by squirting gel on your abdomen, for fuck’s sake DO NOT say to your wife/support person, “Honey, it’s fun time! Take notes, she warms her gel.”
Yuck!
DO NOT:
Ask me, “What are you going to do with it?” or “Will I get a happy ending?” when referring to your erect penis during your testicular exam. That’s the quickest way to halt your exam and send you home whether the exam is complete or not.
I could go on forever here, but I want to hear your stories too! Submit them on the home page.
-JD
Guilty!!! 🙋♀️ Brought my spouse….in my defense it was because I couldn’t see the screen and wanted an answer before the rad report 😂. However, I did NOT skeeze out the tech with unoriginal jokes.